The Quickest San Francisco Trip

Last week, I traveled to San Francisco for a day and a half for work, and when I arrived, I realized the weirdest thing…

I WAS ALL BY MYSELF. No kids, no husband, no colleagues. And I had 12 hours free. It felt surreal, since I’m never alone at home. “What should I do with myself?” I wondered. “Who even am I?!”

First things first: I took myself to Tacorea for breakfast. They had burritos with tater tots and fried eggs, and I couldn’t resist.

Afterward, I walked it off at The Presidio. While heading through a eucalyptus forest, I stumbled upon the Wood Line, an art installation made of zigzagging tree trunks that you can walk on. It was really beautiful, and I felt like I was five years old. (Can you believe this park is IN the city?!)

My friend Lena and I then linked up for a cup of tea. How lovely are her rings? Honestly, it was such a joy to spend a day doing only I wanted to do — no playgrounds required :) It felt almost revolutionary.

Finally, it was time for the Cup of Jo party at Clare V., the reason I had come to San Francisco.

We had wine and sparkling water and mini sandwiches.

It was such a treat to meet warm and funny Cup of Jo ladies…

and dogs!

We chatted about everything from work to morning sickness to pajamas to lipstick to books to movies. It was like the Cup of Jo comments section come to life.

What a wonderful night! xoxo Thank you so, so much to those who came.

And one of the best parts of the trip was texting with Toby:

His texts make me laugh so much. He sounds 25 years old.

Thank you again, San Francisco, for a really wonderful time! xoxo

P.S. The weird best part of trips, and have you ever traveled alone?

(Party photos by Carol Vaziri for Cup of Jo.)

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Debra

February 17, 2019 9:54 pm

when my daughter was 5 (she is now 21) she and I were at a preschool event where we played the game, how well do you know each other? We had to answer questions about what we thought the other would say. When asked what the perfect day would be for me, I forgot myself and answered something about going out to lunch with a friend, getting some outdoor time, etc. My daughter had to answer first, she said that she thought my perfect day would be something related to spending time with her and her younger (two year old at that time) sister. I felt such shame. I knew my needs were legitimate, but I didn’t want her to feel that she was a burden/not my favorite way of spending time. I interrupted the person giving out the answers and made up something about needing to change my answer. And fibbed about it later when my daughter asked why I changed my answer. It was a huge motherhood moment for me, I realized then how much they needed me to reflect back to them, that they were the best way of spending time. Now I’m 54 years old, and I miss those times, but I very much remember craving time alone, or with friends, or with activities not related to children. I loved the texts. Very empathic. Motherhood IS really an art xx

donna williams

January 24, 2019 7:54 pm

Who knew Cup of Jo had events?! Glad you enjoyed some ‘me’ time and thanks for turning me onto the Taco place. Until next time! I went on a silent retreat when the kids were little and cried the whole time, I was grieving my former self – relating to the “who even am I”. Good to have gal pals.

Martha Patterson

January 3, 2019 2:29 am

I travel to DC a few times a year for board meetings; the days are very packed, so the afternoon I arrive and day I fly home I carefully plan for me time, to do something I haven’t done before. I always try to find a new restaurant, visit a museum, shop or neighborhood I haven’t explored of before…and sometimes I visit old favorites too. My kids are nearly grown, so I don’t have the demands of younger kids…..but I really look forward to and savor the time just for me!

Kim

November 5, 2018 1:01 pm

I feel the same way when I was out for the day on my own without my 2 toddlers. Felt weird while sitting in a movie theater with my gf from college. There’s no kids tugging on me or calling mommy mommy it was silence. I didn’t have to watch my time. As moms we need mommy time. At the end of the night I still love hugging my girls to sleep.

julie

November 1, 2018 1:12 pm

i moved to england for work, didn’t know anyone, not married, no partner, no kids, no pets even, i spend a lot of time alone, actually moved a few times to places where i didn’t know anyone, i’m thinking of changing careers so i can live near friends and family bc as much as i love england (and alone time) i have the very opposite weird thing i noticed, i would love to have 12 hours with some people i love (outside of work) “who am I?!” i wonder who i would be if i had close loved ones around all the time.

Liz

October 30, 2018 1:57 pm

amazing! I started out reading this by thinking “ugh, I could never have kids!” (no offense, I just love my personal time haha) and ended it by thinking “aww I having a kid must be so heartwarming and sweet” (at times, I’m sure). Just thought I’d mention that because I think its a sign of a well written and honest piece! :) also obviously can’t decide whether or not i want kids and think its hilarious how bipolar my thoughts are on the topic

Kritika

October 29, 2018 8:42 am

I wish you could arrange Cup of Jo meet ups everywhere! I live in London and would love the chance to meet fellow readers of this website that I have grown to love more with each passing year!

Lauren

October 28, 2018 1:50 am

You have to come to LA!!

Alexis

October 26, 2018 9:47 am

Omg – the texts are hilarious and heartwarming!
Coincidentally, SF is the only place I’ve traveled to by myself. I stayed with a good friend, but she had to work so I was on my own during the day. I went to CA Academy of Sciences, SF MoMA to see a Barry McGee exhibit, and ate at Swan Oyster Depot. Then my friend and I took the ferry to Sonoma for my cousin’s wedding. We changed ON the ferry and were giggling and laughing because we kept saying it was like that movie The Sweetest Thing. We were even wearing the same colors. Such a fun weekend!
These days I’m hardly alone and so when I do get some rare solo time it takes me a minute to figure out what to do with myself!

alana

October 26, 2018 9:39 am

Please make Texts with Toby a thing! ;)

monica fedrigo

October 24, 2018 10:02 pm

hahahahahahahahaha! Love the pic, looks like a wonderful trip : ) love seeing the pics of who was at the party! I just missed it! those texts are HILARIOUS!!!!!

Megan

October 24, 2018 9:36 pm

LOVE THIS! Hope I can make it to a Cup of Jo event one day :) And his texts are the SWEETEST…he’s like a 64 year old in a child’s body, so cute <3

Thanks for sharing! Have a wonderful rest of the week!

Elizabeth Ryan

October 24, 2018 5:25 pm

I’m DYINGGGGG of laughter at texting with Toby.

Beth

October 24, 2018 3:21 pm

Based on the photo following the “…” I totally thought you were going to say that the weird thing you realized was that your hair is curly on the coast. Lol. I lived in Vancouver BC for 3 years and it WAS the weirdest thing (having come from Ontario). Looks like it was a great trip!

Maia

October 24, 2018 3:05 pm

How fun! You trekked all over. I live right above Tacorea.